Fun with Vaati
by bleachUlquiGrimm
Summary: Yachiru gets sent to Hyrule where she meets a very interesting sorcerer. Fun times today for Yachiru!


Yachiru's Adventure!

YEAH!!! Kenny said he would play with me today! I'm so excited! I don't know what we should do first! We can play all sorts of games. There's tag, hide and seek, tea party, cooking, dress up, and other things! I don't know what to do first! Tee hee! It doesn't matter. Whenever I'm with Kenny, I have fun. Oh look! There's Kenny now! I ran over to him as happy as could be. He didn't look too happy, but he always cheered up when I was around.

"Kenny! Have no fear! Yachiru is here!" I jumped on his back excitedly. He looked at me.

"Yachiru! What do you think you're doing?"

"I'm on your back silly!"

"I know that. What are you doing here?"

"Umm. I live here, right?" I smiled. He shook his head. "Don't be so serious Kenny! It's bad for your health!"

"You need to go Yachiru."

"Go? Why!!!?" I wailed. He groaned.

"Can't you see I'm busy? I have no time to play."

"B-but Ken-chan!"

"Go!"

I climbed off of Kenny's back. I was heartbroken. Kenny didn't want me! After all we had been through, and now he hated me. He was sending me off! He was abandoning me! He was so mean! Fine. I didn't need him if he didn't need me. The joke's on him. He doesn't have anyone to give him great directions anymore! B-but I was just a child. Where was I going to go? I put my small finger on my lips. Where did people go when there was no hope left? They died. I couldn't die! NO! NO! NO! I trudged past the squad eleven barracks and bumped into a tall figure. Uh-oh, it was Mayuri Kuro…Kurotsuchi? I bumped into Whitey.

"Yachiru? Interesting. Aren't you always with Zaraki?"

I sniffed.

"He ditched me! He doesn't want me!"

"That's too bad. Where are you going?"

"I don't know where to go…"

"I can send you to another dimension. That would get Zaraki to miss you."

"You think!?" I smiled nice'n' big for him to see. He did a smiley-frown.

"Yeah. Just follow me into the lab."

I didn't know about this. I wasn't posed to follow Mayuri anywhere. People said he was a creeper. Well, he was helping me…I ran to catch up with him.

"Can I ride on your back, Whitey?"

"Don't call me Whitey, it's very offending."

"Okay, can I ride on your back _Mr. _Whitey?"

"Ugh, damn kids."

"You know, you shouldn't swear."

"Let's quicken the pace, shall we?" He said walking faster. I furrowed my brows. What a douche.

We finally arrived in the lab. He led me through the halls to a room where a big circular device with lightning rods on each side was. I ooed and awed at the big thing.

"Say hello to the transporter 3000. It will take you anywhere."

"Anywhere?" I said. He nodded.

"Of course it hasn't been tested."

"Then I don't want to use it." I tilted my head and smiled.

"What if I give you…this?" He held up a sweet roll of pecan bread. My eyes sparkled. Pecan bread was my favorite besides Walnut, and Kiwi, and black bean. I crossed my arms.

"Hey! You don't play fair!"

"Of course not, dear, I'm a scientist."

I rolled my eyes. Oh, it's not like Kenny wanted me anyway. I guess taking a risk like this wouldn't hurt… a lot. I took the bread, ate it, and stood in front of the teleporter. He turned it on. A surge of energy filled the room.

"Let's start simple and send you to Hueco Mundo."

I nodded. The machine hummed and whirred making it impossible for me to hear anything. Then the lights flashed red. The machines energy spiked. Mayuri yelled something I couldn't hear. He was motioning for me to come back, but I was being sucked into the machine. I grabbed on to a piece of metal. I yelled for Kenny. The metal broke. I flew into the teleporter to parts unknown. I was not in Soul Society. I was traveling through some warped tunnel. The lights were pink, green, blue, and red, all around me. Yellow lightning struck everywhere until I landed and hit my head on something knocking me out cold.

* * *

Back in the labs. Mayuri was in panic. What had he just done? Something went terribly wrong just now. Mayuri checked the machine. Yes, something had definitely gone wrong. The power had gone crazy. Wait. Yachiru had been sucked into that thing! Oh no, oh no, oh no. His ass was as good as dead. He just sent a _lieutenant_ to an unknown world. There was sure to be some punishment behind this. No, he would pretend nothing happened. If he didn't confess to anything, he would be fine. He took several deep breaths. Okay, he was going to be okay.

"Mayuri!"

Oh no. Kenpachi. Mayuri looked at his unwelcome guest.

"Zaraki, how good to, uh, see you. What do you need?"

"I thought I heard Yachiru scream."

"I have no idea-" Kenpachi had Mayuri up against the wall by his collar.

"What did you do, you sick bastard!?"

"I didn't do anything!!!"

"Then where is she!?"

"I have no idea! Seireitei's a big place! She could have just run off somewhere!"

"I heard her in here! What's that contraption over there?" He snarled.

"It's a…teleporter."

"MAYURI!!" Kenpachi slammed him into the wall again.

"Okay, okay! She tried the teleporter."

"Where did it send her?"

"Here's the thing…"

"Mayuri!"

"Off of me you overgrown beast and I'll tell you!"

Kenpachi narrowed his eyes and dropped Mayuri. He dusted himself off and walked over to the control panel.

"The girl wanted to go to another place, so I told her about my teleporter. It hadn't been tested…"

"Yachiru would never use something she knew wasn't safe!"

"I might have bribed her…"

"Pecan bread?"

"Affirmative. Anyway, something went wrong when I tried to send her to Hueco Mundo. There was a spike in energy."

"So where is she?"

"I don't know…"

"Can't you find out!?" Kenpachi barked. Mayuri pounded his fist on the machine.

"If you would be patient!!! It looks like she's in a place called…Hyrule."

"Hyrule? What the freak is that?"

"What indeed."

Yes, what the freak is Hyrule? None from Soul Society or the World of the Living had ever been to this place called Hyrule. You and I know what it is, but they do not. What will happen to Yachiru in the mysterious world of Hyrule? Let's find out.

* * *

I woke up with a headache, not a good way to wake up. It looked like the cause of my K.O was a log with mold, no, moss on top of it. Logs? There were no logs in Hueco Mundo. I had been here once. It was supposed to be a desert with a few tree and little Hollow animals. Where was the dome of Las Noches? No, I must not have been in Hueco Mundo. All around me was a forest. Not a lush forest. There was crabgrass, the water was green, and there were bridges and statues. I was in a different kind of forest. I stood up a little tired from my trip. Good, I still had my zanpaku-to. I would need it when I diced Mayuri up. I couldn't! I don't know where I am, or how to get back to Soul Society! I huffed. This really sucked.

"Hellloooooooooooooo!!!!" I cupped my hands around my mouth and yelled. There was no answer. A light! I could get out that way. I came out into a lighted area. This was much better. There were a lot of puddles everywhere and the grass here was much better treated. I sighed. I still didn't know where I was. I kept walking looking at my surroundings. There was no way I was in Hueco Mundo. Mayuri, that dodo! He didn't know what the heck he'd been doing. I shouldn't have let him bribe me into doing this. The pecan bread was good though…Another sigh, a longer one. I kept walking. There was no way I was going to get out of this place. I didn't even know where I was going. I finally gave up when I ended up back at the entrance to the crazy green forest. I was going to cry. I could feel the tears. I missed Kenny no matter how much he hated me now! I cried, and cried, and cried.

"Stop that."

I opened my water logged eyes. Who was this? A boy dressed all in purple? A boy with red eyes? A boy with black marks under his eyes? Who was this? I looked at him not daring to take my eyes off of him.

"Who are you?" I asked putting one of my hands on my sword. I never really used it, but I would if I had to. The boy grinned evilly.

"You do not know of me?"

I shook my head. The smile grew. He told me to stand up. I did. He looked me over.

"You're young." He frowned.

"You're young too."

"Wha-! Foolish girl! I am over a thousand years old, older than some of the gods themselves!"

"You look like a plain, old teenager to me." I crossed my arms and looked away. He ground his teeth together.

"You are an aggravating child."He growled.

"And you're not too bright. Well, color wise you are." I smiled.

"My purple is supposed to strike fear into your very soul!"

"I prefer pink." I pointed to my hair. He scoffed.

"I have no use for such a dullard. Away from me."

"You approached me."

He stomped his foot on the ground.

"To stone with you, you annoying child!" He pointed his finger at me. A blue shock wave came out of it. I unsheathed my sword and deflected the wave. He looked at me and blinked. I kept my sword in my hands gripping it tightly. That was the first time I ever had to use it. He smiled again.

"Well, well, it looks like you're not useless after all."

I kept my eyes on him. He looked at me.

"I just noticed. That attire you wear…you're not from around here, are you?"

I shook my head still staring at him. He looked up.

"Hm. I could make use of you."

"I'm not helping you with anything! You just tried to stonify me!"

"And I apologize. If you come with me, I'll help you get home. I am an almighty sorcerer."

Sorcerers only existed in fairy tales. Where was I?

"What's your name, sorcerer?" I held the sword out at his throat. He moved it away with his left hand.

"Just call me Vaati." He smiled.

"I'm not going to tell you mine." I smiled.

"Very well, follow me." He started walking. I followed him.

* * *

Mayuri and Kenpachi kept looking around the lab for answers to explain the mysterious happening that took Yachiru away from them. Kenpachi sighed and looked up from the pile of paper he had been looking at.

"Mayuri!" He called.

"What is it? Did you find something?"

"No, I haven't. I need to ask you something."

"What? What?"

"Do you know why Yachiru wanted to go to another place?"

"She said you didn't want her."

"What would make her think…oh."

"What?"

"I was looking for something I lost in the barracks, and she came over and distracted me. I yelled at her…"

"Tsk, tsk, Zaraki."

"Shut up and keep looking!" He put his eyes back on paper. _Yachiru, don't do anything stupid._

_--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
_

"Vaati!!! I hate walking!! Where are we going!?!"

"Be patient, you little brat…"

"You're not nice at all!!!" I started crying. Vaati groaned.

"Stop! Stop! STOP!"

"You don't even try to comfort me!! You purple poopy head!!!"

"Oh my Din…What would make you feel better?"

"Can I ride on your back?"

"You most certainly cannot!"

"WAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIII!!!!! DO you enjoy the sound of me crying!?!?"

"UGH! Fine, climb on!"

I tackled him to the ground. I looked at him.

"You're not as strong as you don't look."

He grumbled under his breath probably cursing. I laughed.

"You have no tolerance."

"For little girls…"

"GO FASTER!!" I ordered. He looked at me.

"Who do you think you are doing ordering me, Vaati, around!? Huh!?"

"I'm the lieutenant of the strongest squad in the Soul Society!" I smiled proudly. He made an annoyed sound.

"I doubt you would be placed in charge of a whole squad…"

"Read my badge!" I stuck my lieutenant's badge in his face.

"What is this? I can't read it."

"Can't you read Japanese?"

"Japanese? What language is that? It must be an old tongue."

"No it's not! It's a good tongue! So, wait, if you can't speak Japanese, then what do you speak?"

"Minish."

I laughed very loudly and flailed my arms causing him to lose some of his balance.

"If I have to carry you, at least stop moving around so much."

"Sigh, I miss Kenny. His back had more room."

"I wish you would use your own, two feet to walk." He sighed.

"You're silly Vatee!"

"Vaati."

"Right, what did I say?"

"Ugh…"

"You're name is too hard! I'm gonna'call you Red Eyes Purple Douche!"

"WHAT!? Don't call me that. How did you even come up with that?"

"You have red eyes. You're skin is purple colored. And lastly, you're a real D-bag!"

"Do you even know what you're saying!?"

"Mmm…Kenny only taught me the word. He never told me the meaning."

"This is what you're saying." He whispered in my ear. My face turned disgusted. That word just made it to my Yucky List.

"Ah, here we are. I could have transported, but I didn't know if you would survive."

A castle. A castle in the sky. This place was weird. It was weirder than Mayuri and...and Szayel Porro Granz combined!

"How do we get up to the castle, Plaati?"

"That's not a word…And we climb."

"Huh!? Well, I guess you better get climbing."

"Oh no! You're climbing by yourself!"

"What? Why? I pouted.

"You're heavy."

"Are you calling me fat!?" I wailed. He shook me.

"Shut up! Climb!"

"I didn't hear a please." I crossed my arms. He yanked at his hair.

* * *

"Damn it, Zaraki!" Mayuri yelled, "You're messing up my lab!"

"I have to bring Yachiru back!" He yelled throwing papers all over the place. Mayuri put an arm on him.

"Zaraki! I found the answer."Mayuri nodded.

"What! When?"

"Just now when I caught the paper you threw. Look."

"You made this tiny mistake?" Kenpachi eyed Mayuri.

"Even brilliant men such as myself make mistakes."

"You want to get punched?"

"Heh. Shall I retrieve the girl?"

"YES!!"

"They went to fire up the machine.

* * *

"That was the longest climb ever." I panted. Plaati looked at me.

"I WAS THE ONE CLIMBING!!!" He yelled.

"It's not nice to yell."

"It's not nice acting like a brat."

"It's not nice calling people names."

"It's not nice…shut up, girl."

"Oh, just call me Yachiru."

"Yachiru? And people say my name is weird?"

"No, Vaati. In Japanese, you are Gufuu."

He blinked twice and looked up at me.

"Gufuu?"

"Gufuu."

"Gufuu?"

"Gufuu."

He was real quiet. He stood up and pondered. He looked at me.

"Gufuu?" He said with a tone. I nodded, smiled, and laughed.

"Very well. As long as I am still all powerful."

"You're not."

He dropped the majestic pose he was in and looked at me with hunched shoulders.

You are one annoying kid."

"You're a meanie, so that makes us even!"

"Smartass." He grumbled.

"Dumbass." I smiled.

"A-ha! Swearing isn't nice!" He thought he had me. I rolled my eyes.

"You sweared…idiot."

He stomped his feet wildly.

"Brat! Brat! Brat!"

"Are we going in the castle?" I yawned. He picked me up by my collar with one hand. I smiled at him; he was smiling his evil smile.

"New plan. I'm going to drop you." He walked to the edge and held me over. I looked back at him with a nervous smile.

"I thought we were friends, Gufuu."

"Don't call me that! My name is Vaati! And we are not friends! I was going to use you for my own purposes, but you are too damn annoying!"

"You're a meanie."

"And don't you forget it." He said releasing me. I grabbed the edge with my toes.

"I don't want to fall."

"Too bad!" He stomped on my foot.

"OWCH! That wasn't nice!" I hopped back up to the platform we were on.

He looked at me.

"You're nimble. Face my fireballs!" He fired off the fire at me. I dodged them. One hit my arm and burned it. I looked at my wound. I looked at the smiling sorcerer. I got pissed. (We all know what happens when Yachiru gets pissed! If not, see the episodes where Ichigo is fighting Kenpachi, it's one of those.) The pink energy surrounded me. Vaati looked and stumbled back.

"What…What madness is this!?"

"You! Listen you! You have upset me enough!" The pink energy shot at him.

* * *

"Yachiru! It's me Mayuri! I'm here to get you."

I smiled at Whitey and kicked him in the balls.

"You stranded me in this fun world Mr. Whitey! Never do that again."I laughed.

He held his crotch.

"I'll make a note of that…" He whimpered. He looked at Gufuu laying on the ground moaning. Mayuri blinked. "A friend of yours?"

"Yeah! He was real nice!"

"Then why is he...?"

"Oh, just because. Let's go. Bye Gufuu!"

Vaati moaned. He heard them leave. He shivered. That girl..._she_ was true evil. He shuddered.

* * *

"Kenny! You do want me?"

"Yes, I was mad because I lost your favorite toy somehow."

"OOOOOH!" I said. He handed me a little dagger.

"Yea! You found it!" I squealed with delight. Mayuri had a very shocked look on his face.

_Her favorite toy is a dagger? Is that normal for a little girl?_

I smiled. At least everything was back to normal!

* * *

YEA HAPPY ENDING!! I love when a good plan comes out okay except I wanted it to be funnier. Maybe I'm losing my touch of funny...NOOOOO!! Well, The End and all that jazz. ^ ^


End file.
